(the following was written while deep into my nesting time with Zara – about 3 weeks postpartum)
I looked at my newborn baby and asked her, “Who are you?”
She looked up at me and said,
“I am your messiah – I came to redeem you by showing you that love is what is missing in that deep black hole in the center of your body that can only be filled by pouring itself out in beams of bright luminescent lovelight onto me. When I feel the light from you, I, in return, give you hope and purity – the chance to be born again
When the milk spills out of my mouth because it can‘t all fit in my stomach, I am reminding you of how you are also drinking from the breast of our sacred mother, who always has more than enough milk for you – producing the perfect amount and composition based on what you need and want – YOU determine how much there is by how much you suck.
When I smile and try to form my first sounds to speak with you, I am asking you – how happy do you want to be? Because there is no limit to that, either.
When I cry for you I am telling you that you are loved and needed by the universe. In the same way that I cry for you is how IT cries for you – for your compassion and love. Without your attention, we will die – all of us.”
Then, as my baby’s eyelids began to grow heavy, she yawned, whispering – “come on mama, come lay down with me in your arms – lets dream together now.” I kissed her with a tearful smile and said – “I was thinking the same thing…”